Note:

I want a bluetooth so I can walk around being a douchebag to everyone I
encounter

Sleeping lately has been a joke. I toss, I turn. I think, I think, I
think. By the time I change positions and glance at the window, the
sun's already up.

If I could lay in bed listening to cliche songs about heartache and
other irrelevant subjects I'd be perfectly content...

imissedyourskinwhenyouwereeast.

Which came first the music or the misery?

It's not the people who you dated that you get hurt by in the end.

It's the people who you never get the chance to fuck anything up with
that really get under your skin.

Sure the failed relationships suck for a certain amount of time, but
really the only people I've really been emotionally effected by long
term, have been people who I've been involved with without any emotional
repercussions AND people who I've never gotten the chance to fuck
anything up with.

It's really horrible to say but the only few hours of sleep I've gotten
in the past several days have all been nightmares. I don't know what
I'm supposed to do right now when it comes to this.

I'm going to openly go out and state I've done some less than moral
things lately and people who actually know me know what I'm talking
about. also, if you don't know, it's really none of your fucking
business either.

I've been burning candles a lot lately, ones that smell good and
entertain me with a flame, ya know...the normal kind of candle?
Everytime you blow the flame out it gets a little worse everytime you
light it again....it reminds me of something I can't quite put my finger
on.

The song "I Will Possess Your Heart" by a little band called Death Cab
For Cutie has a few opening lines I find way too fitting to even list
here. The rest of the song is pretty creepy though, creepy in a
hey-it-works-for-ben-gibbard-though way.

I've always listened to music and dabbled in making music. I do this
crazy thing where the ratio of lyrics to music is about 20:1. I feel
like throwing it all away and just starting over, but then all the
shitty lame life lessons that have happened to me will be like going to
waste...fuckmylifesometimes.

I waste my life on music,literature, lust and cinema.
I live my life, I'm happy with some of it, and I'm at least
attempting...fuck, I am changing it. I'm changing my life. There we go.
I'm out there

Now I'm going to go back to watching High Fidelity and wishing I owned a
record shop...

As of late

I keep having this strange dream where I'm running from my worries into
a white room. When I enter the white room I slam the door and keep my
worries out. I relax. I settle. Then more worries keep flooding from my
head and I drown in them

I settle .I relax

I settle. I relax. I drown

As of late

-------------------------------- 1:40 am -------------ashleyevidencex:
My thoughts won't stop racing
ashleyevidencex: Im trying to calm myself down. And when I do I envision
myself being chased by my worries then shutting a door and being in a
white room by myself
ashleyevidencex: But the thing is, thoughts and worries still keep
coming out
ashleyevidencex: No curtains
ashleyevidencex: No windows
ashleyevidencex: Just a white room

I got a bone to pick with capitalism and a few to break.

Life is good.

Fail.

great english there amiright?

I feel like

A legit adult now

W00000

LOLZ